This is so well said James! A much needed, and refreshing, tone in the sea of bad advice for men. I just wrote a piece on the epidemic among men being loneliness and I’m so encouraged to see other men doing this work for themselves and sharing it with the world. Voices like yours are so needed.
I almost put: aggressively pursue friendship as one of the things I did to come out of my rut but thought I'd keep it a bit more focused. Fostering a group of friends who care about each other and support each other is so important. Loneliness sucks.
Powerful recount here James ! Thank you for speaking for so many. I see my millennial son go through much of what share here . Men need to embrace their divine feminine and release the ‘ideal man ‘ mindset, and JUST BE A HUMAN WALKING THE HUMAN JOURNEY 👏🏻🎶👍🏻🎉
One of the pieces of advice from PUAs in the 2000’s was that men should have a purpose that isn’t dependent on women, family, etc. Interesting that that seems to have disappeared from the manosphere.
I think the manosphere is obsessed with achievement for the sake of status and that is a huge problem. You achieve things so you can be dominant and the "head of the family". Just feels like a bad place to build a life and community from...
The publishing industry is dominated by women (it’s a statistical fact). And stories can save us (that’s not statistical or fact, but I know it to be true). And men are more likely to suicide. I won’t complete this equation. Keep writing.
I was talking with Amie about this the other day. Men leaving positions of leadership in creative industries doesn't solve any of the problems of patriarchy. By no means should we return to the old ways of purely white men in power, but if men continue to leave our cultural institutions, they will get more bitter, aggressive, and lonely which just causes bigger problems.
Thanks for writing this James. I’m in that place now at 28 after a major autistic burnout last year. I’ll keep hold of this article for the advice and the reminder that someone else gets it.
Proud of you, James! I love your writing and loved your book club and can't wait to read one of your books some day, even if it isn't the OG fantasy one 😉
25M here 🫡 this is all so vastly important. It often feels like there aren’t good male role models for young men, but once myths of masculinity are dispelled, you can see them all around.
I absolutely love this. Yes, there are a lot of things we need to work on in general, but purpose can make all the difference.
Thank you, Maggie. Purpose is so important!
This is so well said James! A much needed, and refreshing, tone in the sea of bad advice for men. I just wrote a piece on the epidemic among men being loneliness and I’m so encouraged to see other men doing this work for themselves and sharing it with the world. Voices like yours are so needed.
I almost put: aggressively pursue friendship as one of the things I did to come out of my rut but thought I'd keep it a bit more focused. Fostering a group of friends who care about each other and support each other is so important. Loneliness sucks.
100%. And it’s hard to be vulnerable with friends as adults when our vulnerability and sensitivity is shunned as boys.
I’ve been saying this for a while. Got more in touch with it after getting divorced and getting into dating apps. The things I’ve heard.
Oh, I can only imagine!
Powerful recount here James ! Thank you for speaking for so many. I see my millennial son go through much of what share here . Men need to embrace their divine feminine and release the ‘ideal man ‘ mindset, and JUST BE A HUMAN WALKING THE HUMAN JOURNEY 👏🏻🎶👍🏻🎉
Yes to humanity!!
👏👍👌
Loved this piece. And I am glad you found your purpose!
One of the pieces of advice from PUAs in the 2000’s was that men should have a purpose that isn’t dependent on women, family, etc. Interesting that that seems to have disappeared from the manosphere.
I think the manosphere is obsessed with achievement for the sake of status and that is a huge problem. You achieve things so you can be dominant and the "head of the family". Just feels like a bad place to build a life and community from...
An article much needed. Thank you for sharing these words 😊
Great article. Love it.
The publishing industry is dominated by women (it’s a statistical fact). And stories can save us (that’s not statistical or fact, but I know it to be true). And men are more likely to suicide. I won’t complete this equation. Keep writing.
I was talking with Amie about this the other day. Men leaving positions of leadership in creative industries doesn't solve any of the problems of patriarchy. By no means should we return to the old ways of purely white men in power, but if men continue to leave our cultural institutions, they will get more bitter, aggressive, and lonely which just causes bigger problems.
You’re truly the best man, James! Will send this to my partner too as it’s so needed to hear that for men in this world! 🙏
Thanks for writing this James. I’m in that place now at 28 after a major autistic burnout last year. I’ll keep hold of this article for the advice and the reminder that someone else gets it.
Proud of you, James! I love your writing and loved your book club and can't wait to read one of your books some day, even if it isn't the OG fantasy one 😉
Just brilliant! Thanks so much for writing this James.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
25M here 🫡 this is all so vastly important. It often feels like there aren’t good male role models for young men, but once myths of masculinity are dispelled, you can see them all around.
This is such an important conversation that needs to happen more. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing, James 🩷